One kayaker, one Jack Russell, one portulaca

Today I took Jack for a looooooong walk at the Sydney International Regatta Centre on Penrith Lakes. "Set on 196 hectares of native and landscaped parkland", the Centre hosted all the rowing and sprint kayak events during the Sydney 2000 Olympic Games. "It has now been re-invented to become a popular sporting, corporate and social venue", and is said to receive an average of 50 000 visitors a month.

Jack undertook the challenge of two x 1.5 kms (to the starting line and back to the car park) with great gusto, always trying - and succeeding, if his Extend-a-lead permitted - to stay just ahead of any walker on the path. He'd only been there a few minutes, but you'd be convinced that he knew the place intimately, and owned the path, the river, the water, every tree and blade of grass, and all of Penrith District. Typical Jack Russell. Jack was quite interested in the ripples of tide against the pebbled edges of the water course. Not to mention the groups of ducks and other waterbirds. But what really caught his attention was the sole rower on the water. Suddenly, as he or she passed by, Jack decided that that person had no right to be paddling a kayak on a Sunday afternoon and Jack began to bark enthusiastically.

He's incredible sleepy tonight, of course, and just looked at me with big cow eyes, indicating that it was time for the toy tiger to come out of its cupboard, so that Jack could retire to his sheepskin mat beside my bed. Mind you, it's only 10.30 pm as I type this, and he's normally content to wait until I'm ready for bed myself.

From lone kayaker to lone portulaca! Several of last year's glorious (self-seeded) portulaca display, here at home in the backyard, have themselves self-seeded - and they really do look fantastic, spilling casually over the rock walls of the elevated garden alongside the pool as if they had been artfully placed there on purpose. Today, a single stem of portuca plant, which had grown up, unnoticed, from a thin crack in the concrete surrounds of the pool, bloomed with a glorious red flower. Amazing!





The single portulaca joins the lone Black Pantha agapanthus (below) that has graced us with its presence this year. Although they are more of a deep purple colour, last year both of my Black Pantha specimens took a rain check on putting out flower stems. Very annoying when they cost so much more than the average blue or white agapanthus (many of which were no-cost hand-me-downs from elderly relatives and friends), and which grow like the introduced noxious weeds they were recently labelled as by the Blue Mountains Council.

Epiphany!

Today's the traditional day for taking Christmas decorations down. I was in the local supermarket yesterday - and, of course, the shops are already putting out stocks of chocolate Easter eggs!

As you've dutifully followed my virtual Christmas decorating ritual for these past twelve days, you've now earned the right to see my tree topper:



A US penfriend once sold me his collection of "Star Trek" character Christmas ornaments, originally from the "Star Trek Experience" in Las Vegas and - as I already had a Spock and a Picard from the annual Hallmark range - this new Spock, complete with Vulcan lyrette, ended up at the top of my Christmas tree as the angel. All he needed were some golden wings from Spotlight and a copper wire halo. This year I finally got around to customising the blue uniform shirt to make it reflect the uniform that Spock wore in "Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan", the film in which Spock did end up singin' with the angels. (At least until the next sequel.)



The next batch (below) includes some ornaments I couldn't help but purchase from the beautiful Ahwahnee Hotel, at Yosemite National Park in California. It was the morning of 27th December 1983, if I recall correctly and, after a sumptuous buffet breakfast, we discovered that the hotel was selling off its stock of Christmas ornaments. Okay, so I weakened. So much for "just one ornament per year", my original intention.



Clockwise: Stuffed fabric unicorn handmade by US penpal, Francine; Ahwahnee Hotel bargain bin cloth partridge (without the pear tree); Ahwahnee wooden unicorn/Pegasus; Ahwahnee wooden ballerina; felt Australian Christmas bells (wildflowers), a leftover souvenir/gift of Australia that somehow never found a new owner; and Super Pickle, a cool superhero clip-on I found somewhere in the States! (Every sandwich in USA comes with a pickle on the side, it seems.)




Clockwise: The "Rodney Reindeer" stuffed toy was very popular in that same San Francisco department store that sold the clowns (see previous blog entry); and some items found in my stocking at Rhonda's parents' house on Christmas morning, 1983. These all get put onto the tree each year: a Santa Claus pen; a little toy truck (Rhonda got girly stuff); a miniature picture book called, "Christmas Around the World"; and an aluminium Steadfast Tin Soldier, which was originally filled with unshelled peanuts. (Yep, five grown adults in a room, generating as much Christmas morning present-opening as possible.) The kazoo was sold by Farrell's Ice Creamery somewhere near Martinez, California, where I celebrated a birthday. The staff traditionally sing you "Happy Birthday", accompanied by kazoos.

Thanks for joining me on this virtual tour of my 2006 Christmas tree. Now I have to go pack it all away...

On the twelfth day of Christmas

Nearly there. Today's Christmas ornaments are:



Above left: For 1984, the bone china unicorn was originally part of a boxed set - of "Alice in Wonderland" and "Through the Looking Glass" character ornaments. I'd actually admired them in various shops for several Christmas seasons in a row. They were manufactured in Taiwan in 1974 from A Company Of Friends. I wasn't enough of an "Alice" fan in those days to want the whole set, but several individual pieces were really appealing. When it became obvious (in 1985 and 1986, when people kept giving me extra ornaments) that I'd be needing two ornaments per year, not just one, I decided to buy the now-sold-loose, and bargain-priced, unicorn - and then date it retroactively. I felt quite justified in doing so; I'd wanted him for years, and would have bought him in 1984 if he'd been available as a separate item. The ceramic teddy bear is very heavy, and quite posable, as the arm and leg joints are on elastic bands. I stood in the shop for ages trying to work out which was the most expensive, single ornament that I really, really liked. And the teddy won out (but I think he was responsible for breaking several branches on my first plastic Christmas tree). Both of these ornaments came from Grace Bros. at Roselands, bought two years apart.

Above right: For 1983, the wooden donkey was my first Christmas ornament. (I'd yet to move out of home, but was saving to buy a flat.) The donkey is handmade, from two and a half dolly pegs, felt scraps, wool and wiggly craft eyes, by an elderly Californian neighbour of an American exchange teacher colleague, Rhonda, with whom I spent Christmas of 1983. Rhonda had taught with me in my first year of full-time teaching in 1982. She took me into Elta's house in Martinez to see "a traditional American Christmas tree" - and it was hung with hand-threaded strings of real popcorn (preserved since the tragic death of her daughter many years earlier), gorgeous, old, blown-glass baubles, and hand-crafted dolly peg animals. Elta asked, "Which animal is your favourite?" - and this was presented to me, duly signed and dated by Elta. She'd also made camels, reindeer, moose, horses, and many others, from different combinations of the wooden pegs. Truly charming! The cute fabric clown was "the" special decoration of the year at a large San Francisco department store, famous for its Christmas displays - one entire floor was strewn with fake snow - and a huge toy department. They had several large Christmas trees on display that were exclusively decorated only with tinsel and these little clowns, every one of them of different colours and patterns of fabric. For several years, my clown played "tree angel" and was perched at the top of my tree each Christmas, until he got demoted by a certain Vulcan.

On the eleventh day of Christmas

There has been considerable discussion on "the boards" (TrekBBS) lately, to debate Vulcan's controversial twin/sister/planetoid. We first saw the orange Vulcan sky during "Amok Time" in the 60s, but it was in the first episode aired, "The Man Trap", that Mr Spock revealed that "Vulcan has no moon, Miss Uhura." Uhura is "not surprised".

However, the Filmation background artists on "Star Trek: The Animated Series" (TAS in the 70s) did not notice a handwritten comment, "Remove moon", by DC Fontana on her sign-off of preliminary artwork for "Yesteryear" (above left, image from the View-master reels packet of the episode). Thus, Vulcan did get an orbitting planetoid - or perhaps, a sister/twin planet. When "Star Trek: The Motion Picture (TMP, (above right) was hurried into release in 1979, with the film barely dry enough to show on premiere night, the planetoid survived. (Only to be removed for a different interpretation of Vulcan's sky for TMP's "Director's Edition" DVD.)

Filmation's TAS wasn't removed from the official "Star Trek canon" until 1989, when the tie-in licences were renewed under tighter restrictions, and the licensees of the "Star Trek" novels, comics and roleplaying games (RPGs) were asked to refrain from referencing TAS. (That memo, of course, has slowly ceased to have influence since Roddenberry's death in 1991. See the many TAS references in other "Star Trek" tie-ins my webpage Toon Trek.)

"Spock's World", a hardcover ST novel by Diane Duane, came out with much publicity and critical acclaim in 1988. The planetoid was spelt T'Khut in "Spock's World", and also in "Voyager: Pathways" by Jeri Taylor, "The Worlds of the Federation" by Shane Johnson and "New Worlds, New Civilizations" by Michael Jan Friedman. The planetoid's name was given as T'Rukh in the hardcover novel, "Sarek", with an explanation from the author, AC Crispin, that the name changes are seasonal. (Like the names for the phases of Earth's moon, I guess.)

But - before all that - the planetoid had already appeared in another Pocket novel set on Vulcan, entitled "The Vulcan Academy Murders" (1984). Here it was called T'Kuht, and the author Jean Lorrah acknowledges fanfic identity Gordon Carleton for coining the planetoid's name, and his effort to explain its appearance in "Yesteryear" and TMP, and thus reconciling the old (canonical) TOS quote from "The Man Trap". Because, according to that old memo, if it's live action and its onscreen then its canonical.

Hope that clears it all up. Yes, it's four days into the New Year and I'm still mooning you.

Today's Christmas ornaments are:



Above left: For 1986, the wooden Santa Claus is riding in a hot-air balloon. A cool way to deliver presents to hard-to-visit places? This ornament was a gift from my mother, who, over the years, has been determined to undermine my "only two items per year" policy, and often tucks crafty ornaments into my Christmas gifts. The carolling penguins caught my eye while wandering through the now-defunct Waltons department store adjacent to Bankstown Square.

Above right: For 1985, the three white ceramic geese were quite expensive and came from Grace Bros., Roselands. Obviously these geese are half of the famous "Six geese a-laying..." from the song, "The Twelve Days of Christmas"? The wooden Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer was a gift from my friends Karen and Tim; a souvenir from their trip to Katoomba, in the Blue Mountains, the week of the premiere of "Star Trek III: The Search for Spock". Karen and another friend, Eric, took Tim (a Star Trek club member visiting from Perth) to do some touristy things when I was stuck at work.

On the tenth day of Christmas

Yesterday afternoon, a casual glance out the front window happened to connect with the next door neighbours' huge black Rottweiler, Tyson, roaming the street! Now, according to the neighbours, Tyson is quite the pussy cat - and a scaredy cat - having been treated cruelly as a puppy by previous owners, but he's so aggressive when passersby venture too close to his domain that we all find it hard to believe that he wouldn't take a chunk of human flesh as a souvenir just for us daring to live in the same street. (Or at least chew on an ear, like his namesake.) But here was Tyson, a trainee Hound of Satan, free at last!

I strode out to the front yard, feigning confidence, lest I end up on the menu, only to find that Tyson had already returned to his own house, and was waiting near his owners' front steps. Wagging the tiny stump that is his tail, he greeted me with a glint of mischief in his eye. It was then that I noticed he had something in his mouth. (A toy, perhaps? A thick branch? A garden gnome? A Jack Russell terrier?) I wisely chose not to cross the invisible barrier between the two front yards, and instead elected to call out, "Doreeeeen!", until the neighbour appeared on her verandah.

"Tyson, what are you doing out?" she asked him. It was only then that we both realised exactly what Tyson had in his mouth: a huge piece of raw Christmas pork on the bone, still wrapped in white plastic netting. I guess we should be grateful that it wasn't a dismembered human arm, or similar - but a dismembered pig's leg was disconcerting enough, even just after Christmas. (Was there a three-legged pig wandering the streets of Penrith?) Although some houses in the street still had their garbage bins out from the day before, none appeared to have been knocked over, leaving us to wonder just how he came by his prize. We hope that Tyson hadn't accosted some hapless, elderly pedestrian returning from the butcher's with a post-Christmas bargain. Maybe someone tossed it to him, to get the giant, black, salivating Hound of Death off their lawn?

When last seen, Tyson was safely back in his yard. Doreen had replaced the length of Colourbond fencing panel that Tyson had so easily popped from its frame, and she was affectionately brushing dirt off Tyson's nose. Of course, he'd just buried the meaty evidence. It should ripen quite nicely in that huge hole he dug for it.

Today's ornaments, as we hurtle towards Epiphany:



Above left: For 1988, I barely recall finding the little orange Christmas dinosaur. He may have come as a boxed ornament, from Grace Bros. in Roselands. The ceramic snowman is actually a bell, with his black ceramic shoes as the clanger. He was bought "on special" in a country town's gift store during a holiday in the late December/early January. Probably Albury, New South Wales.

Above right: For 1987, the wooden Garfield the cat, of "Garfield " comic strip fame, wears a jester's outfit, complete with real little bells. I can't remember where I bought him. Probably Grace Bros., Roselands. The ceramic moose just bellowed "Buy me!" when I saw him, although I seem to remember he was quite expensive, and I only rationalised buying him because I only buy the one expensive ornament each year. The antlers seem to be cast separately and then glued into position. Like Garfield, he also wears real bells and came from Grace Bros., Roselands.

On the ninth day of Christmas

Yesterday Jack and I managed to avoid the downpours of rain and spent about an hour walking briskly through historic Parramatta Park. I was pleasantly surprised that dogs were permitted, as so many public places actively discourage them, even when on a lead. We had to "stay ten metres from children's play areas and barbeques", but the rain had already scared away most of the park's users for the day.

After that, Jack got to visit Punchbowl, and a little white Maltese terrier he knows: she's the very cheeky Jessie and we are always guaranteed many belly laughs when the two of them romp together. Jessie demonstrated how she can spin in the air 360 degrees, and Jack showed off the new trick he's been learning: "Sit, drop, roll!", complete with an often-hilarious howl of embarrassment when he doesn't wish to do it again. (Who said you can't teach a middle-aged dog new tricks?)

Needless to say, he's still passed out on the couch, poor little guy...

How curious that I ended up going right past Punchbowl Public School, where I was teacher-librarian from the beginning of 1991 till the end of 1997 - and here I am this week describing Christmas ornaments from that period of my life! I now present today's batch, as we continue to journey back through time:



Above left: For 1990, the cross-eyed, stuffed polar bear carries an empty sack on his back, and can presumably be filled with sweets, although I've never done so. Another purchase from the Lakemba pharmacy/newsagency. (I'd forgotten how many of my collecton came from there.) The tiny dragon and knight ride a wagon, and comprise the smallest ornament in my collection. One year it got left on a branch when the tree was stored away. Purchased from Grace Bros. in Roselands.

Above right: For 1989, the miniature rocking chair, made of real wood, is a simple, yet bold, statement on the Chrismas tree. It came from Grace Bros. in Roselands. The round wooden frame, containing a small, handmade reindeer tapestry created by my sister-in-law, Michelle, was included in my Christmas gift from my brother's family.

On the eighth day of Christmas

Happy New Year!

The midnight fireworks telecast has just finished on Network Ten, so I figured I should get this post up ASAP.

The organisers were hailing the display as the most amount of fireworks they've ever done, and that it is the best in the world - and of that I have no doubt. We are probably just spoiled and take the beautiful Sydney harbour, city skyline at night, the Sydney Harbour Bridge (celebrating its 75th year) and the fireworks (and musical accompaniment) for granted, but it did look and sound rather the same to me. Mind you, the television broadcast fails to capture the intensity of the colours of each explosion compared to when you see them for real, but my days of trudging into the city, battling for viewing space, waiting for hours as the youth of Sydney get wasted, and getting home again with crowds of (tired, grumpy, sunburnt, tipsy) people who forgot to wear appropriate clothing, are over.

Anyway, since we've entered a new month and a new year, I'll just fill you in on what I've been doing so the blog menu shows up properly. Very few visitors get to see my Christmas tree on display, it seems, so I'm doing a virtual presentation of all the ornaments. I like to hunt for unusual Christmas tree ornaments - only two per year, one expensive and one el-cheapo-but-cute. Then I scrawl dates upon them and try to imprint some favourite memories of people, places and things connected with those ornaments. It's not that hard because it's only two per year, and they usually reflect aspects of my life at the time.

Well, it seemed like a great idea on Christmas Eve. I'm a bit surprised none of the pics have garnered any comments, though.

No matter! I shall continue. I have meant to catalogue them formally for years, and have attempted to make handwritten lists several times, but I usually file them - somewhere. Today's Christmas tree ornaments:



Above left: For 1992, the Hallmark Galileo shuttlecraft from "Star Trek" can be added to a light string, and it also contains a computer chip with a voice message from Leonard Nimoy, especially recorded for this ornament: "Shuttlecraft to Enterprise, shuttlecraft to Enterprise. Spock here. Happy holidays. Live long and prosper." Unlike Hallmark's figural character ornaments for "Star Trek", the ships were not sold in commercial quantities in Australia, due to the different wiring needs. I did a little tweaking to get my imported shuttlecraft, bought from The Phantom Zone in Parramatta, working - but, sadly, the voice chip stopped working in 2005. Although it still lights up, the whole light string gave up in 2006. Most new light strings have different sockets these days, so the shuttle shall remain dark. Santa Claus riding a dolphin to deliver his sack of gifts came from a specialist Christmas shop in Boston, USA, the same day I went to the famous real location of TV's "Cheers" bar, way back in the January.

Above right: For 1991, the wire-bespectacled crescent moon man was a boxed ornament from Grace Bros. in Roselands. The wooden gingerbread man is such a happy little ornament. He can swing his legs back and forth. He was probably also purchased from Grace Bros. in Roselands. Because I was in the USA for Christmas 1991, my tree didn't get put up that year.

Q: "How many 'Star Trek' fans does it take to screw in a light bulb?"

A: Five. One to screw in the bulb, and four to bitch about it.

Ah, I forgot the one who will pre-empt the screwing of the light bulb by posting a rumour to the Internet and forgetting the spoiler warning.

And the ones who then blame Brannon Braga for the burnt-out bulb, even though he'd played no part in its manufacture.

On the seventh day of Christmas

Not much to report this morning. Did some more housework yesterday, and went to the movies to use up my last discount Hot Cash before the coupon expired (ie. today). I saw "The Queen", which stars Helen Mirren, in an excellent, thought-provoking docudrama about the reactions of the Royal Family to the death of Diana, the Princess of Wales. These days, this kind of movie usually turns up as a telemovie or mini-series on TV, but it was refreshing to see this on the big screen. Fascinating!

Here are today's Christmas tree ornaments:



Above left: For 1994, the (very heavy!) ceramic, church-shaped stable is hinged, so it can open up to reveal the Nativity scene. Baby Jesus is in a water-filled glass ball on one side and the onlookers are on the other side, reunited only when the stable is closed up. Purchased from David Jones' city store. The little raccoon inspects a bag of Christmas gifts. This cute little ornament was purchased from Grace Bros. in Roselands.

Above right: For 1993, this decoration celebrated that year's big animation movie, Disney's "Aladdin". When a cord is pulled, Genie raises his arms. From Grace Bros. in Roselands. The silver plastic Tin Woodsman, from "The Wizard of Oz" was found in a local "Two Dollar Shop" and was good timing, since there was a great stage show version doing the rounds at the time.

Happy 2007 everyone!

On the sixth day of Christmas

While cleaning up some file boxes in the garage this week, I found a batch of my "Star Trek" movie scripts, which I haven't seen since I moved house in 2000. I'd forgotten that I owned three versions of the ST III script, in addition to Harve Bennett's slim bootlegged premise, ST III: "Return to Genesis".

But in the so-called FIRST DRAFT script of "ST III: The Search for Spock", dated March 23, 1983 -- well after the Romulan crew of "Return to Genesis" has officially morphed into a Klingon crew -- Mr Bennett has this to say about the controversial makeup change from TOS:

"Present are the 1ST LORD of the Klingons, and his command staff. The variety of Klingons will be fully explored. Elders have been seen in STAR TREK I. Forehead bumps are marks of age and wisdom, not common. What is common is that they are a dark race of large and frightening appearance."

The "elderly" Klingon idea has obviously been nixed by the REV. FINAL DRAFT script of September 13, 1983, because Valkris wears a half-veil to hide her own bumps, and Captain Kruge is described as a "handsome but frightening presence, and relative youth".

(Since those early days, of course, we've seen Alexander, Worf's son in "The Next Generation" series, as a toddler with a matching bumpy forehead to his Dad's. Then we had Worf's enigmatic comment in DS9's "Trials and Tribble-ations", and a two-part explanatory episode about the origins of smooth-foreheaded Klingons in "Star Trek: Enterprise".)

The early script also specifies a flotilla of Klingon heavy cruisers, and Kruge's cloakable Romulan Bird of Prey that "Trek buffs will recognize" from its "distinctive bird & wing motif". After they watch the Bird of Prey turn visible, the script goes on:

1ST LORD: What is this? None of you knew?

3RD LORD (hastily): It is his toy, sir. A Romulan prize. He has perfected their Cloaking Device.

1ST LORD: Commander Kruge, I want you here... Now!

INT. BIRD OF PREY BRIDGE - ON KRUGE

KRUGE: Always your servant, my Lord.

(He turns and CAMERA reveals his CREW, the most awesome collection of large, cruel and piratical men since the Pittsburgh Steelers of the Seventies. We will see more of them later.)

KRUGE: Well, my jolly lads, a few more triumphs like this and we'll all be back in prison.

(then turning)

Try to behave yourselves while I'm gone.

My take on it all? I reckon this Kruge probably should have had a Klingon parrot on his shoulder (but perhaps the lizard/dog from the REV. FINAL script ate it?)

A major character difference is the addition of vulcanoid (Romulan?) defector, Galt, who essentially fills the role taken by Maltz the Klingon in the final film. Galt is actually welcomed back to Vulcan by Sarek at the end of the movie.

Towards the end, instead of the REV. FINAL DRAFT and FINAL SHOOTING script version of Kirk saying to Kruge, "I... have had... enough... of you!" the FIRST DRAFT script has Kruge saying, "The last face you see, Kirk. The last face you ever see."

He then grabs Kirk in a choke hold, they struggle, and Kirk seems doomed - but when the zombie-like Spock grabs Kruge from behind, Kirk is able to break free, retrieve the Klingon dagger and throw it into Kruge's back. Then he asks Galt to beam them up, abandoning several remaining Klingons to their fate on the doomed Genesis.

Bennett's script notes also say: "The writer suggests to the producer and director that no acting credit be given for the role of SPOCK until the END CREDITS. (And that's what they actually did. There's a blank space in the opening credits of ST III, where Nimoy's acting screen credit should normally be.)

Cool, eh? Anyway, here are today's Christmas ornaments:

Above left: For 1996, the Coca-Cola polar bear mascot, sitting in the stocking to chug down his Coke straight from the bottle, was bought just after that Christmas, from a countertop display in a roadhouse (on the way to wherever I was holidaying in January 1997). Marvin the Martian, from "Looney Tunes", was a Hallmark boxed ornament. He has a Santa sack of (Acme?) dynamite over his shoulder and is, no doubt, trying to clear his view of Venus for Christmas. As Marvin would say, "Isn't that lovely?" Purchased from Grace Bros. in Roselands.

Above right: For 1995, the cute mouse on a swing has a hard head and a soft, stuffed body. He's actually standing up on a swing, and the swing's rope is what attaches to the tree. Another purchase from the Lakemba pharmacy/newsagency. The haloed angel cow is made of some form of clay and looks like it's been homemade, but was from Grace Bros. in Roselands.

On the fifth day of Christmas

Yesterday, my friend Leonie and I went to see the new Ben Stiller movie, "Night at the Museum". Based on Milan Trenc's children's picture book "The Night at the Museum", this movie is a lot of fun, with some great special effects that are seamlessly incorporated into the story. (Why should toys be the only things to come to life at night?) this film should make anyone eager to take a stroll through the New York Museum of Natural History. By day or by night...

Today's ornaments:



Above left: For 1998, one of my favourite ornaments: Pinky and the Brain, two determined mice attempting world domination, and have seemingly achieved it by wrapping up the Earth in Christmas lights and carrying it away. From the "Animaniacs" cartoon series, and bought from the Warner Bros. store in Parramatta. The little troll with Christmas hair, tie and pixie boots, is actually a girl's hair accessory for a ponytail. I bought him from the Lakemba pharmacy/newsagency, back when I lived in that suburb.

Above right: For 1997, the Christmas elf with the Jack-in-the-box just had lots of appeal. It's spring-loaded and came in a display box from Grace Bros. in Roselands. The cat is unusual and wasn't intended to be a Christmas tree ornament. The head is ceramic and the body is a tiny bean bag, made of patterned material. He doesn't actually hang from the tree, but rather reclines on the top of several branches. I bought him from the Lakemba pharmacy/newsagency.

On the fourth day of Christmas

I spent a good chunk of the day back at the school yesterday. The general assistant was on duty, which meant I had access to my old classroom. Tossed out lots of files and old worksheets I won't be needing any more, in my quest to make my room look vacant, yet welcoming for the new teacher arriving to take up my class teacher position.

Today's ornaments:



Above left: For 2000, the first Christmas in the new house! A ceramic camel mask on a long handle, from a floristry and giftware store near Eastwood Station, when I was working at Scan in Ryde; and a ceramic teddy bear in denim jeans and a hand-knitted jumper, and holding a hobby horse. He came from the all-year-round Christmas shop in Windsor. These ornaments were bought many months apart, and I hadn't realised they both had a "mounted on long sticks" theme. 2000 also marked the first year of a new Christmas angel, but you'll have to wait till Epiphany!

Above right: For 1999, two "M & M's" candy tube toppers (from Target). Promoted as "the candy for the new millennium" due to "MM" being the Roman numeral for "2000", so it seemed a natural for turning into an impromptu Christmas ornament. The miniature skateboard-riding Lori Custer sock monkey was bought in an eBay USA auction, and is actually made from baby-sized "red heel" socks. The purchase started out as a joke when I was demonstrating to some colleagues at the Scan office just how eBay auctions worked, and we all fell in love with this particular one. A few months later, when the creator realised she'd overcharged me on postage, she sent me out a second miniature sock monkey for free: an editor sock monkey, blue pencil tucked over one ear, working away at a tiny computer.

On the third day of Christmas

If you're looking for a fun cinema experience these holidays, and wish to avoid the huge queues for all the latest movies that opened on Boxing Day, you can't go wrong with Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan. Sacha Baron Cohen, creator of British television's "Ali G", has discovered within himself an embarrassing new persona, whom I can only describe as a Middle Eastern version of Norman Gunston. I had a great time giggling away to myself. Even the subtitles - and the modesty patches over some of the unexpected nudity - are hilarious. Highly recommended!

Jack's favourite Christmas present has turned out to be his new "squeakie", a gift from my friend Zena. She bought him a "Divin' Dude", a cute pink and green dog made of wetsuit material, which means it might be a little tougher than the average dog toy -we'll soon see - and can even be used in the pool. But I had to laugh at the tag, which has a short essay on "The Importance of Play". It says, in part: "Depriving your dog of play may result in boredom which may lead to behavioural problems such as excessive barking or destructive chewing or digging." Well, I can guarantee some "destructive chewing"... as Jack diligently attempts to remove the squeaker from inside of "Divin' Dude"!

Today's ornaments:



Above left: For 2002, a unique metal mesh Christmas stocking from Grace Bros. in Penrith; and Woody the cowboy of "Toy Story" riding a Christmas bauble while using a rope lasso, purchased from the Disney Store, probably the one in the Sydney CBD.

Above right: For 2001, A reindeer-antlered Snoopy the beagle with little Woodstock from the "Peanuts" cartoon strip. It originally came with chocolates, from Target; I think this might have been a leftover gift I'd bought, and I decided it would make a fun inclusion to my tree. (I also got to eat the chocolate, of course.) The frog with the luscious lips and sparkly crown actually opens on a hinge to reveal a secret hiding place for - whatever! It came from a very cool magic and giftware store, Fantasy Road, which used to be at Fox Studios, Moore Park.

On the second day of Christmas

Okay, this is really weird.

A few years ago, I was wandering through the Christmas Cave here in Penrith, one of those popular warehouse-looking retail/wholesale outlets that had just opened up in Penrith for the first time. The place had some very reasonably priced, larger-sized plastic Christmas baubles, especially made to go on outdoor Christmas trees, ie. because the garden had lots of blue flowers in it at the time, I bought a package of metallic blue balls.

It was a bit of a challenge getting enough baubles up into the higher sections of the huge pine tree in the backyard. Essentially, from chair height, it entailed grabbing a fist full of foliage, pulling it towards me, looping the bauble into place, then letting go. Unfortunately, I managed to launch at least two baubles, as if on a Medieval catapault, over the back fence and into the neighbouring yard. (The neighbours did eventually toss them back over.)

The decorated tree looked amazing but, after a few weeks of the hot Penrith sun, most of the baubles had lost their metallic sheen on one exposed side, so the next Midwinter Christmas, I had to place them other side out. Of course, whenever the wind blew, they'd rotate around to expose their faded sides. By the time of the next outing, the were more plain aqua than shiny metallic blue and I needed to purchase some glittery gold plastic shapes to supplement the decore. These new ornaments have lasted surprisingly well over the years, although last year I seemed to be missing one faded blue bauble and one glittery gold bonbon shape when packing everything away.

That was also the year I stepped back from my chair to admire my work after decorating the tree, only to end up in the pool: clothes, watch, wallet and all. I limped about with a sprained ankle for the rest of November, all of December and most of January. The things we do in an attempt to celebrate Christmas with a little flair.

Anyway, after last year's soggy debacle, I was rather reluctant to go climbing for my Midwinter Christmas in July, and I still didn't find time to paint the round baubles with some strong, outdoor-resilient glue, and smother them in new glitter, in time for this Christmas, either - and then we had one day where it absolutely bucketed down with rain for most of the day - so it looked like the backyard was going to be decidely less festive this year.

Then, yesterday, as I was making breakfast, I looked out to my decoration-free yard - and, hanging high in the tree, was a lone glittery gold bonbon ornament glinting in the morning sun! It was one of the missing trinkets from last Christmas season. Hidden for an entire year, the massive downpours of rain we had on Christmas Eve had exposed it from wherever it had been, lost inside the tree. Another miracle of Christmas, I guess!



I had an immediate urge to race out with the chair - or maybe a stepladder this time - and put up the rest of the outdoor decorations, but I noticed the pool smirking at me, and recalled the pain of my ankle the year before.

But wait, there's more! This morning I went out into the yard and my eye was distracted by a flash of blue: sitting beneath the pine tree is a single blue Christmas bauble! It, too, has spent at least a year, lost in the densest part of the tree, and had chosen Christmas Day to drop back into sight.

Truth is stranger than fiction, and bizarre coincidence is alive and well in Penrith... Either that, or it really is a sign that God has a sense of humour. (Some of my crueler "friends" have told me that the vision of me falling into the backyard pool while decorating my pine tree last year was the real proof that God has a sense of humour.)



Above left: For 2004, the goofy-looking horse (left) came from a specialist Christmas shop, probably the one in Leura in the Blue Mountains.. At right, a miniature picture book of "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" by Dr Seuss (bought from Angus & Robertson to use in class that year), plus a last minute addition: a Grinch-as-Santa ornament, found at the Parramatta Collector's Fair - several years after searching for one (especially popular after the Jim Carrey movie came out). Better late than never.

Above right: For 2003, a tiny teddy bear ornament, originally attached to a Christmas gift from my cousin, Christina. The glamorous giraffe in the shoe, seemingly inspired by "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert"(?) is applying lipstick. She came from the specialist Christmas shop in Leura in the Blue Mountains.

On the first day of Christmas

I was very slack/busy this year and almost didn't get my Christmas tree up in time. The school year went right up to the Thursday of last week (21st), a week later than we used to experience in the 60s, 70s, 80s and 90s - and soooo inconvenient for doing Spring cleaning, decorating for Christmas and relaxed shopping. The last few years, in order for the Easter break to be longer, we break up later and it seemed like I was still writing comments for students' report cards when I shoulda oughta been tidying up around the house.

Last night, I was still decorating the tree and it occurred to me that I can relate many anecdotes about my Christmas ornaments. In the early 80s, I'd read an article in one of my Mum's old "New Idea" magazines, of a young married couple, so short of money after their wedding, that they had no money left to buy many decorations for their first Christmas together. They ended up pooling their cash and buying just one single ornament, which they dated - and thus began an annual tradition: of buying one, perhaps fairly expensive, unique ornament. Over the years they built up a Christmas tree full of important memories, and the cumulative effect of such a, um, well-hung(?) tree is infinitely more special that one covered with the contents of a bag of el cheapo baubles from the local Two Dollar shop.

The idea really appealled to me, especially because there fashion and decorating trends are even reflected in Christmas ornaments - certain styles, colours, glittery effects, commercial tie-ins, etc that firmly root a particular ornament to a time and a place - so when I knew I was about to buy my first home unit, I used a trip to the USA (December 1983) to start my hunt for unusual ornaments, to scrawl dates upon and perhaps to imprint some favourite memories, for my own tree. Of course, I couldn't restrain myself to two ornaments that first year, and I've usually try for one expensive, and one el-cheapo-but-cute, ever since. Watch this space over the twelve days of Christmas!



Above left: For 2006, a Hallmark "Superman Returns" over the Daily Planet; and a Homer Simpson as Santa, complete with stolen candy hidden behind his back. The Superman came from a local Target store and Homer from "The Simpsons" was a souvenir of the recent staff shopping trip (the Christmas Cave at Alexandria).

Above right: For 2005, a silver and frosted glass snow ballerina from a Christmas store cut-price sale in Katoomba in the Blue Mountains; and Spiderman carrying a webful of toys, purchased from The Phantom Zone comics collectibles shop in Parramatta.

'Twas the night before Christmas...

Merry Christmas everyone. Santa is on his way to Australia. Don't forget, the Aussie boomers do the first shift, then the reindeer take over for the northern hemisphere.



Yes, it's Santa's little helper! Smile Jack, it's almost Christmas!